The swing

I thought about titling this post "the revolving door" but that always carries such a negative conotation and I thought swings are always fun.

One minute Sam is absolutely certain that he wants out of his city and out of the force. He curses it. Swears up and down that he hates work and will never go back. I hear about it literaly 24/7. But it takes one dinner with my parents this weekend and he was backpeddling just a little. He went on an undercover bit Friday morning and the few arsons that popped up and he was all excited about being a cop again, talking to my parents about trying for the detective bureau. I swear, I can't win with this man.

But then he hates having the posibility of blood on his hands. He almost killed a man on a call. He had the conscious thought to put a bullet in the man's head if he made the slightest movement. Please excuse my graphic description. He has a habit of telling me about work in a pretty raw and honest manner. He was on a call to a suspicious person sitting in a car. He approached the car, the man was sitting in the front seat slumped over and his hands out of sight. He shone his light in the car and saw the gun on the man's lap. The man was unresponsive, passed out drunk, a fact he says saved the man's life.

I'm not sure if he's still bothered by it or if he loses sleep over it. He can't exactly afford to lose sleep over it but I do think he still thinks about it and tries not too. I think I'm the one that loses sleep over things that happen at his work. Its why I stay up late on nights that I have to be up early for work the next morning...much like tonight. At least its his short week so I'll only be up late three nights this week instead of four. I wish I had more control over these nights.